


Late At Night (When All The World Is Sleeping)

by Lilas (pegasus_01)



Series: Dreaming Of You [1]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Episode Tag, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-13
Updated: 2011-05-13
Packaged: 2017-10-19 08:15:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/198800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pegasus_01/pseuds/Lilas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny has a relapse and he and Rachel have a talk. (Coda to 1x23)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Late At Night (When All The World Is Sleeping)

Danny let out a shaky breath as he watched Chin handcuff Sang Ming and pull him back up on his feet. He could feel his arm muscles burning from holding the gun trained on the con as Steve reholstered his gun and grabbed the fugitive’s other arm. He watched as both men started herding the man out of Five-O’s headquarters towards the holding cell, probably intent on questioning him and figuring out their next plan of action. Slowly, Danny brought his arms back down, his grip on his gun tightening reflexively as his hands began to shake.

 _Adrenaline_ , Danny thought wildly. _It’s just left over adrenaline. Nothing to worry about_.

He inhaled sharply as a wave of cold sweat swept over him, leaving him wobbly and lightheaded. He licked his lips instinctively and felt the sweat pooling there, the salty taste making his stomach churn uncomfortably. He could feel his muscles spastically clenching and had a second’s moment of clarity where he knew, _he knew_ , what was going to happen next. Without warning, his fingers slackened and the gun clattered to the floor, the noise a booming thunder in the tense, silent room. Distantly, his mind registered that someone (Steve) had shouted his name, but the feeling as though he’d been plunged into the ocean and the black spots that danced in front of his vision were enough to distract him. He had the sudden feeling as though his head were about to float away from his body and the next thing he knew, he was on the ground, blinking sluggish eyes open to see Steve’s worried face looking down at him.

“Wha…” He stopped, coughing at the dryness in his throat. Instinctively he tried to sit up but a firm hand on his chest stopped him.

“Stay down, Danno,” Steve said, pushing him back down. “Kono–”

“The ambulance is three minutes out, boss,” she replied, crouching down on Danny’s other side.

“What?” Danny looked from one worried face to the other. He cleared his throat and limply waved his right hand around. “Someone care to tell me–” He stopped short as a sudden tightness around his chest forced the air out of his lungs. It felt like a band of steel was wrapped around his ribs, and with a jolt of fear he realized he couldn’t breathe. _He couldn’t breathe he couldn’t breathe he couldn’t–_

“Woah! Woah! Take it easy, Danno! I got you, I got you,” Steve shouted as Danny’s hand surged up and grabbed at Steve’s shirt, pulling him down even as Danny started hyperventilating. “Danno, Danno!” Steve shouted, pulling the other man up and maneuvering around him so he could lean back against Steve’s chest.

With a glance at Kono, Steve saw as the rookie reached for Danny’s shirt and popped open the top buttons, giving him more breathing room. He watched as she took Danny’s face in her hands and shook him lightly, trying desperately to snap the blond out of his panic attack.

“Danny! You need to slow down your breathing, Danny!” she ordered as she snapped a finger in front of his face.

Steve could feel Danny jerk back towards him at the noise. He tightened his arms around his partner, pinning them to his side in an attempt to center him and hold him down. Steve could easily feel the rapid in-and-out motion of Danny’s chest, the uncontrollable muscle spasms, Danny’s cold sweat seeping onto his own clothes and chilling him to the bone. Danny wasn’t calming down, and though his pulmonary system might not be on the verge of shutting down from a neurotoxin, everything else was a side effect of the sarin poisoning and the panic attack was more than enough to do the job the sarin would have done.

Without thinking, Steve leaned down to whisper in Danny’s ear. “Danno, you’re fine. Listen to me. You can breathe if you want to. Breathe with me,” Steve reassured him, tightening his arms around the shorter man. “In and out, Danny. In…” Steve took in a deep breath, holding it in until he felt Danny trying to breathe with him, “and out…” he whispered in a hurried hush as the air flowed out of him.

He could feel Danny trying to follow his lead and did it again and again until he heard the rushed sounds of the paramedics’ shoes running down the hallway and Kono shouting for them. And then they were there, dumping bags all around them and shouting words Steve didn’t understand. He watched as they put an oxygen mask over Danny’s mouth and prepped a needle before injecting the contents into Danny’s arm. Steve counted Danny’s pulse right along the paramedic and knew the exact moment the drug took effect, Danny going limp in his arms and his breathing steadying.

“We need to take him to the hospital,” the nearest paramedic said, looking at Steve.

“He was just released,” Steve replied numbly, because Danny was unconscious in his arm and he’s breathing steadily again, but Steve could feel how heavy it was, how it’s sluggish and how it hitched every other breath.

“I wasn’t asking for permission, Commander McGarrett,” the paramedic said, directing the others with unknown hand gestures as a gurney was brought in.

Silently, Steve watched as they loaded Danny onto the stretcher and rushed him out of the room. He stayed on the floor a moment longer, watching the swinging doors of the headquarters and imagining the medics loading Danny onto the waiting ambulance. He snapped out of it when he felt a small hand closing over his shoulder, digging into the muscle. He looked up to see Kono leaning over him, her hair cascading around her face.

“You should go to him,” she said, tightening her hold on him. “He won’t want to wake up alone.”

Steve swallowed and thought back to the day before and how he’d waited hours, _hours_ , for Danny to wake up, his stomach in knots and his emotions frayed past his breaking point, and how he’d walked in on Danny and Rachel cuddled together on the bed. How Danny had looked at him, confused but happy, and how he had laughed silently, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose at the absurdity of the situation. He thought about Danny telling him how Rachel and he have been going on for awhile now. He thought about the hug and how he could still feel Danny holding him flushed against him, arms tight around his shoulders and patting his back like Danny needed to know Steve was there too, like he needed the reminder that Steve was solid and _there_.

Steve blindly reached for his pocket and pulled out his phone, staring at it. He should go to him, but maybe… Maybe he wasn’t the one that should be there when Danny woke up. Maybe he wasn’t the one Danny wanted by his bedside when he woke up. Before he or Kono could talk himself out of it, Steve turned his phone on and speed dialed Rachel.

****

When the world came back around him, the first thing Danny smelled was antiseptic. The next thing he heard were the beeps and whooshes of various machines. With a groan, he realized where he was and instinctively tried to curl onto his side in a vain attempt either to get away from or to pretend he wasn’t back at the hospital, again. A hand on his shoulder stopped him, and the gesture was so familiar that it halted his movement before he could even process that’s what he’d done. Under the overwhelming antiseptic smell, he could smell a familiar perfume that reminded him of black oak furniture and slanted sunlight streaming past the half closed blinds on a lazy Saturday morning.

He licked his lips and croaked out a pathetic sounding, “Rachel.”

Almost immediately there was a straw bumping against his lips but it’s pulled away after only a couple of sips. He could barely stop the frown curving his lips downwards and blearily opened his eyes to glare at his ex.

“Sorry Daniel,” she said, her accent making her voice that much smoother and softer. “I’m not sure we’ve reached the phase in our relationship where I’m ready to see water and bile gushing out of your mouth.”

He smirked. “We reached that phase on the second night of our honeymoon.”

He watched as the smile that unfurled on her face smoothed away the worried wrinkles on her forehead. He could feel her hands restlessly move around the bed sheets, worrying them only to smooth them back down again, over and over. On the next pass next to his hand, he grabbed her wandering fingers and squeezed them tightly until she looked at him.

“Hey,” he said softly.

She scoffed and squeezed his fingers. “I thought we’d agreed never to speak of it again, Daniel,” she admonished him, her eyes shining, whether from tears or mirth he wasn’t sure.

He shrugged and grinned slyly, wiggling his eyebrows.

“You’re incorrigible,” she grumbled as she swatted him and moved behind him to rearrange his pillows so he could sit up.

As she settled back into the chair, he pushed himself up and finally had his first look around the room. Unlike the last time, there was only Rachel and him; no Steve, no Gracie. He frowned at that and swept his gaze around the room until he came back to Rachel, seated on the chair, one leg crossed over the other, hands wriggling together as she watched him take on his surroundings.

“So, don’t take this the wrong way,” he said, “but you weren’t exactly the one I was expecting to see.”

“Well…” She cleared her throat. “Steve called, said you’d had some kind of relapse and had been taken to the hospital. I… I rushed over and…” She trailed off, not sure how to say what she needed to say.

“Rachel…” Danny sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “What about Grace?”

“Stan has her,” she replied. “I haven’t told her yet. She was at school when Steve called and I couldn’t… I just…”

“Rachel,” Danny snapped, quickly losing his patience. He groaned when he saw Rachel’s eyes ice over at his tone and he knew this wwas only going to go downhill at his next question, but he had to ask. He had to know. “Why are you here?”

“Why am I…? What kind of question is that, Daniel?” she asked, clearly affronted at his audacity.

“A perfectly fair one.”

“You’re the father of my only child! Where else would I be?” she asked.

“With said child,” he snapped.

“Well, my husband can take care of my chi–” She stopped short and shut her mouth so quickly Danny wondered if she’d broken a tooth. There was a beat of silence between them, filled up by the staccato beeping of the heart monitor. Rachel looked down and cleared her throat uncomfortably. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have…”

“No,” Danny agreed. “You shouldn’t have.” He stared at her silently for a beat, watching as she wringed her hands together nervously. “Rachel,” he said and waited until she looked up at him. “Why are you here?”

“I…” she started, and stopped, and stared at him for a long moment before visibly deflating. “I miss you,” she finally confessed. “I miss you so much. I just wanted to… I just needed to know you were all right.”

“Oh, Rachel, baby,” Danny sighed, opening his arms and urging her over to him. “Come here,” he insisted when she hesitated. He waited for her to rearrange the chair so she could lean against him like she had the night before and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, squeezing gently. “Rachel.”

“Don’t, Daniel. Don’t say it,” she said, turning to hide her face in his neck.

“Rachel, I know this isn’t easy,” he said, nose buried in her hair. “Hey, hey. Look at me.” He waited until she did and smiled softly. “I know this is a tough time for you, but you and I… You know you and I can’t happen again, Rachel.”

“Why not?” she demanded. “We worked once, why not again?”

Danny sighed tiredly, staring at the ceiling as he ran his fingers through her hair. “Rachel, this isn’t fair,” he croaked, squeezing his eyes shut. “I never stopped loving you. I still do. But you… You gave up on me. On us.” He felt her shake her head in denial. “I wanted to work on our marriage, I begged you not to leave. Do you remember what you told me then?”

He felt her head nodding under his fingertips even as a sob escaped her.

“You said–”

“Nothing will fix this Daniel, because at the end of the day, you’ll still be a cop, and I’ll still be waiting for that phone call where they’ll tell me you’ve been killed in the line of duty,” she finished, quoting what she’d said to him all those years ago verbatim, and still refusing to look at him.

“Nothing’s changed since then,” he said. “And it’s not because you and I have finally gotten around to becoming friendlier after four years of bitter fights and acrimonious custody battles that suddenly we’re going to be a couple again.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I said that, Daniel. I’m sorry I just… I just walked out, like you weren’t good enough. Because you were. You were so good, Daniel. I’m sorry…” Rachel whispered into his neck, eyes squeezed shut and desperately trying to hold back her sobs.

Danny fell silent for a beat and waited to see if she had anything more to say. Finally, he sighed and leaned his head back, squeezing her shoulder. “I won’t do it again, Rachel. I can’t. Just, please. Please, Rach. Don’t take Gracie away again. Please.”

The sudden sobs that wracked her frame followed by the litany of mumbled “sorrys” were enough to have Danny burying his nose into her hair, squeezing his eyes shut on the tears slipping down his cheeks as he murmured his thank yous over and over again.

**Author's Note:**

> So, like most people, I was in H50 heaven during the episode, gleeing over the many h/c fics we were going to get out of it, when suddenly, RACHEL comes in and spoils my Danny h/c buzz. To say that I was baffled and, how shall we put it, pissed off, would be an understatement. I was really conflicted too, because I love Rachel, absolutely adore her and I have this big plan to write this huge fic about her and Danny, but she was killing my buzz! Especially when we'd had an episode, so far, where Uncle Steve picked up Gracie and told Danno that she could stay at his house until Rachel got back and none of them even batted an eye, like it was totally okay and normal for her to stay over at Steve's! WTF, show. So I wanted to fix it. And there have been amazing fics dealing with Steve's angst. So I decided to approach it from another POV. The fic, as they're wont to do, hijacked the plot and this came out. If enough people want, I might do a sequel with Steve.
> 
> EDIT: This is turning into a series... Oh boy. More to come.


End file.
